Deciding When to Seek Help from a Sex Therapist: Let’s Talk About It

Photo by Maru Lombardo

Navigating sexual issues can be challenging, as a couple’s  therapist I’ve worked with people who have had challenges deepening their intimacy within their relationship. Seeking help from a therapist trained in the nuances of sex can offer valuable support and guidance. Even if you’re not in a relationship, issues of intimacy, sexual expression or trauma might be impacting how you feel about yourself as you’re trying to get close to others. 

 When Should You Consider It?

1. **Persistent Challenges:** If you're facing ongoing sexual problems like low libido, erectile dysfunction, or difficulties with arousal or orgasm, consulting a sex therapist can provide insight and strategies for improvement.

2. **Communication Breakdowns:** When conversations about sex feel awkward or strained with your partner, a sex therapist can facilitate open dialogue and offer tools to enhance communication and understanding.

3. **Trauma or Past Experiences:** Individuals who have experienced sexual trauma or abuse may benefit from therapy to address emotional wounds and rebuild a healthy relationship with sexuality.

4. **Life Transitions:** Major life events such as childbirth, menopause, illness, or aging can impact sexual health. A sex therapist can help you navigate these changes and find ways to maintain intimacy and satisfaction.

5. **Relationship Dynamics:** If conflicts or misunderstandings with your partner are affecting your sexual connection, therapy can help you address underlying issues and strengthen your bond.

Sex therapy offers a safe and non-judgmental space to discuss sensitive topics without fear of shame or criticism. It’s an atmosphere of trust, allowing you to express your concerns openly. You will be able to  understand the root causes of your sexual issues, whether they're physical, emotional, or relational. By uncovering these factors, you can work towards meaningful solutions. From dealing with anatomy, psychology, and relational dynamics for tailored interventions and strategies that are unique to you. 

The goal is to equip you (and your partner/s) with practical skills and techniques to enhance sexual satisfaction and overcome challenges. These may include communication exercises, mindfulness practices, somatic practices and education about sexual health. Most importantly, beyond addressing specific issues, this kind of work focuses on fostering emotional intimacy and connection between partners so you can deepen their bond and rediscover passion.

Deciding to seek help in this area is indeed a deeply personal choice that demands courage and openness. Your sexuality, intimacy, and passion are integral parts of who you are, and you deserve to experience them in fulfilling and enriching ways. By taking the step to seek support from a sex therapist, you are investing in yourself and your relationship, prioritizing your well-being and happiness. Remember, you have the power to cultivate a healthier and more fulfilling sexual and emotional life. Embrace the journey ahead with optimism and confidence, knowing that you're taking proactive steps towards greater satisfaction and joy in every aspect of your intimate connections.

Written by Malissa Pansa-ad, LMSW (she/her)

Malissa Pansa-ad, LMSW (she/her), is a compassionate therapist dedicated to creating a warm, non-judgmental space for clients to bring their authentic selves. With experience at Resilience Lab and Rogue Spirit Holistic Psychotherapy, Malissa specializes in working with couples and families, and is fluent in English, Thai and Portuguese.